Updates

I've put off writing for so long.

Here are some things that have happened.

On the guzheng

I learned and finished 雪山春晓 (Spring Morning on a Snowy Mountain).

I even finished 春到湘江 (The Arrival of Spring on Xiang River). It is a long, long, long way from being perfected, but this is the hard piece I said it'd take me forever to actually play here.

I got together with my groupmates last December (2017) and we even played some songs together; it was a dream come true. We were even going to play one piece at a performance but it fizzled out and never happened.

I was invited to play (solo) at some local community events. The first one is in one and a half weeks and it'll be my first time playing in front of an audience for over a decade.

On life

My good friend and former roommate passed away. This was the largest event of 2018 for me, and really cemented it in being pretty awful. I still think about her all the time. I might write more on this later.

Relearning the guzheng 12

I've been messing around, trying more songs. Magnificient Bronze Gorge, Battling the Typhoon. They're still old ones I've played before, though, nothing new. I listened to some songs on guzheng.cn but nothing has stuck out enough that I want to play it so far.

Anyway.

Here is the full Jasmine Fragrance. (Jasmine Fragrance might be a better translation than Fragrant Jasmine?)

I still have a long way to go, yada yada you know the drill.

Relearning the guzheng 11

I spent some time trying to learn my teacher's version of Dance of Yi by ear. I'm now playing a hybrid of the version in my sheets and hers (but mostly hers--it might be because I heard it first, but I think it sounds better!).

Anyway, here's a full version of 彝族舞曲. It's probably my best recording of a full song so far on this journey. It is, of course, still far from perfect. I get nervous when I play for an audience! Even when that audience is myself, apparently. Ha ha ha.

Relearning the guzheng 10

I FINISHED IT.

By the way, finishing a song means, for me, being able to play the entire thing, even if poorly. And since I suck (a lot) at reading sheets while playing, most of the time, it also means that I've memorized it.

I still have a ton, ton more practice to do on it, but it feels really good to be able to play a song even pre-hiatus me couldn't.

Relearning the guzheng 9

I finally started the fast part for Fragrant Jasmine. I'm doing it, you guys.

The following is a recording from yesterday, the equivalent of almost two weeks of work. (It's a practice with tons of mistakes.) About two pages. It was kind of excruciating to get through, but today I continued it with the tremolo part (not in the recording), and that part is really fun! I was having a ton of fun playing it.

Now the end is so close I can taste it. So close! Only about one and a half more pages, and the last part is just a rehash of the beginning.

I mean, obviously I still have a lot of work to do. First I have to play it well, and then I have to play it way faster, but this is still pretty exciting for me.

Relearning the guzheng 8

Yeah, I'm flighty and undedicated and I have no patience. I'm doing more songs.

I'm still practicing the others. But yeah, other pieces are happening.

I surprised myself by wanting to play 梁祝. I never thought the arrangement I had of it was that great. Well, the beginning is pretty good, but the fast part was just okay.

But here is me playing the beginning. Also sans intro. Some mistakes were made.

You know, I was never amazing at keeping a beat. Like, rushing or dragging (mostly rushing) was something I had to concentrate on not doing... but, man, am I at my worst beat keeping-est or what. It's not rushing. It's just inconsistent.

I feel like it's partially my hands' fault. Like, this is definitely the case with the fast part in Peacocks.

Anyway. 梁祝.





Oh yeah, I've been reflecting on the eight-ish years I'd been taking lessons and what I learned and did not learn. I'll probably make a post on that, too. I just need to organize my thoughts some more.

Relearning the guzheng 7

I somewhat finished 孔雀东南飞. As in, I can play all the parts--just not well, yet.

Here's what I sound like now.

Finally, the full beginning of Fragrant Jasmine sans intro (from June 2), and then today's poor rendition of Peacocks. The tempo is pretty bad (inconsistent) on Peacocks. But it's the whole song.

There's a video I took of myself playing Peacocks from 2009. I made some mistakes in it, but it's obviously very much better than what I've got now. Cleaner. I keep going. Actually, I'm a little surprised how quickly I picked it back up.

Oh, and I can tell that my phone microphone isn't really cutting it, hm.

Relearning the guzheng 6

So the pick tape I bought, it's some poor quality pick tape. I mean, I knew from the moment I saw it was it wasn't as good as my old stuff, but damn, it's shittier than I thought. It's fraying and unsticky and it gets in the way. Annoying.

Maybe I'll have to make a trip out to a supply store to look at the types in person. I dunno.

Also, I've started working on 孔雀东南飞 again. It's easier than 茉莉芬芳, and it's also a song I've actually completed before. Man, playing songs in different keys is annoying. In that, during a practice session, I have to retune multiple times.

Relearning the guzheng 5

So, I remembered that 茉莉芬芳 is a key of G song, but back in the day I played it in D. I remembering bringing it up with Teacher and she was like, eh, just play it in D.

I thought about it (now), and I think I should play it in its proper key. Key of G is the second most common key for songs on the guzheng, apparently, and it's relatively easy to tune for (just change F# to G and it becomes the new 1). Man, I have to admit, I find changing keys difficult. What had always been ingrained as "1" is no longer "1"! Etc.

I thought about not working on it until I'd gotten good at a regular D key song, but, yeah, I guess this is the one I want to play after all.

So I redid it. Here's the beginning again in the correct key.

Relearning the guzheng 4

My pick tape arrived!!!

Kinda awkward wearing them, actually. It's been a while.

I practiced for long time today. I also started working on 茉莉芬芳 in addition to everything else (and upon listening to the entire song online, I'm pretty sure I never completed it). I just want to play everything... but only the slow beginning parts. The fast parts... will have to wait a little. Honestly, these songs are above my level now.

Yesterday I spent some time on guzheng.cn and looked at the pieces used to grade your guzheng level. There are different authorities, but basically, 渔舟唱晚 is a level 4 piece. 战台风 is level 7. 孔雀东南飞 is also level 7 (I had no idea you could use it for a test!). 茉莉芬芳 is level 8, and 春到湘江 is level 10.

My hands and arms are pretty tired.

I recorded a little to see what I sound like currently. Here are my very poor renditions of the beginning of 茉莉芬芳 and 彝族舞曲--both without the intro, and the entirety of 渔舟唱晚 (except I cut out one repetition of the fast part since I'm not up to snuff yet anyway).

Relearning the guzheng 3

Been playing about an hour a day minus the weekends. Back when I played, that's about how much a practiced a day. Maybe even a little less.

I was gonna stick with basic songs but they don't hold my attention. Started working on Dance of Yi today. The best beginning bit after the intro, and the first part of the fast part after. This made it clear that my left hand needs work too.

I hope my pick tape comes soon. I really need picks, man.

Relearning the guzheng 2

I'm still waiting on my pick tape. I really need it to do any sort of tremolo.

Index-thumb picking is improving. (Man, I really want to use my picks.)

I found songs that I absolutely loved and completed that I've also completely forgotten about. Namely, 彜族舞曲 (Dance of the Yi Tribe) and 茉莉芬芳 (Fragrant Jasmine), the latter of which I rediscovered while looking back on my old guzheng-related entries. Wow.

Relearning the guzheng 1.5

By the way, this is the best rendition of 春到湘江 I've found yet on Youtube:

I never finished it, by the way, before I had to stop playing. Got about 2:30 minutes in. It's hard.

I listened to this a lot as a freshman in college, away without my guzheng, dreaming about what could have been.

Relearning the guzheng 1

I play this instrument called guzheng and I used to be good. I haven't played in almost a decade (maybe eight years?). For a long time I've been looking at it longingly with my heart breaking because I could no longer play the pieces I want to play. It was a vicious cycle. I want to get good again. This is a log.

About a week ago I bought four rolls of pick tape from Amazon. They are shipping from China.

Today I went to Walmart for CR2025 batteries for my tuner (it needs two). They were out of stock on the shelves and I had to ask the jewelry counter for some.

My guzheng was tuned to F for 孔雀东南飞, but that is the only song I need it tuned to F for. At first I thought I was gonna leave it and work on 孔雀东南飞, since it's my favorite, but in the end I decided to tune it back to D to work on more basic songs first.

F key goes like this: F, G, A, C, D. What was once 2 becomes 1, etc. I don't need to retune the original 1 (D) and 5 (A).

D key: D, E, F#, A, B

I tried to play some songs without picks. Particularly 渔舟唱晚. I remembered a lot of 渔舟唱晚, but forgot most of the end and how to finish the fast bit.

I remembered more songs than I thought I would. I could sight read better than I thought I would be able to. However, I'm clearly lacking on basic picking technique (first exercise), which kind of surprises me. I'm not sure how long I played for but my right forearm is super tired.

Songs I had left on my stand: 孔雀东南飞，峽谷明珠放異彩 (Magnificent Bronze Gorge) (poor first page was collecting dust on the ground), 蝴蝶泉边，战台风, 绿岛小夜曲, and freaking 春到湘江. Wow. It's going to take me a long, long time to work back up to 春到湘江. This is like a direct continuation of my 2008 guzheng heart.

I'm worried about my guzheng a little. It looks and sounds fine but I've never changed a string on it. What will I do when one breaks? Where do I go buy them? I'll deal with it when it comes I guess.

Tried playing Golden Snake Dance (金蛇狂舞), which revealed my poor index-thumb picking ability. So slow. Guess I'll practice that until I improve.

Right forearm tired.

Curiouser and curiouser

Everyone knows that I love, love, love the Chinese “pop” concerto Liang Shan Bo he Zhu Ying Tai, otherwise known as Butterfly Lovers. It’s a twenty-six minute monster (okay, so maybe not a monster—but the longest song I have on my iPod) and I enjoy every bit of it. And everyone knows I play the guzheng, a stringed Chinese instrument, so of course I tried to play Liang Zhu on that… the arrangement I got didn’t quite have the same majesty, so I eventually let that slide off.

Liang Zhu is by two composers called He Zhanhao and Chen Gang.

About two years later, I came across another song for the guzheng, Mo Li Fen Fang (Fragrance of the Jasmine). I immediately took a liking to it, and am now trying to use it as my solo. It’s great.

Last week, I found out who composed it.

Yeah, He Zhanhao and Chen Gang.

There’s another song I really like on the guzheng, as a solo. I finally got the sheets from my friend and am going to start it as soon as I can (this F key might be a bit tough, I gotta say). It’s a deep piece that feels like a journey, called Kong Que Dong Nan Fei (Southeast Fly the Peacocks).

Today I found out that it is composed by He Zhanhao and Chen Gang.

Citation is needed, as Wikipedia would say, but let me bask in my wonderment for the moment.

WHAT.

September 18, 2009
Correction: I found out a while ago, but Southeast Fly the Peacocks is not by the same composers. Too bad.

Bent cardboard and missing pieces

I can't fix this.

I'll see you in December

Where should I begin?

For eight years, I've been playing in an ensemble of guzhengs. Every Saturday, my mom would drive me out, fifty miles away, to practice. There are six of us. All the other girls are far younger than me, so, when I left for college, I was the first.

My instrument and my group has been an incredibly integral part of my life. I really cannot fully put into words all the work, the literal sweat and tears, the love, the bonds, the time, the money I put into this. For eight years, we built something up. We (or at least I) passionately spilled everything out on those strings, we cemented our relationships. I'm sure we had hundreds of performances, some much, much better than others. Oh my gosh, it's overwhelming, how much we all put into this group.

So, being the first one to leave, with the others having a couple years before they are ever required to think about moving out, I figured, yes, I will be a bit left behind, and maybe they will go on, grow up without me, but I am always one of them, and I will always be able to come back to tumbling group melodies and harmonies. At least for a few more years.

Oh, I don't know what happened! As soon as I leave, it seems, from what I hear, that everything has fallen apart. Members can no longer make practice, our teacher is absent more (maybe she gave up on us, one said), and some of them say that they no longer like the guzheng, that perhaps they are clinging on to thin air every time they practice.

This breaks my heart. Here I am, trying so, so hard just to find a guzheng so I can practice, looking up Youtube videos of our songs, practically counting down the days until I can see them again, until I can go to practice again, and here I am learning, in a span of three months, that there may not be an ensemble waiting for me when I return home.

How does this happen? What am I supposed to do? I can't force them to love something, but, at the same time, there is no way I'd enjoy playing with a group who aren't even into their music. But I love them; I can never leave them. Is this a case of denial, of not appropriately moving on? At this point I'm not even thinking about having to move on. I love the guzheng, but I'm not sure how I can still continue when I'm playing alone. After all we put into it, does it really vanish so fast.

This is breaking my heart. I'm scared to go home now, I'm scared that when I put on my picks, half of my girls won't even be present, and the other half will be just waiting to go home.